I am struggling today. Maybe because it’s Thursday (I would have been 34 weeks. It’s been 11 weeks since he died), or because tomorrow is October 15th – National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day, or because on days when I’m ravenous, exhausted and alone, parenting and grief are savage bedfellows.
Lying next to Ada as she fell asleep, all I wanted to do was get up and eat chocolate. I went to meditate instead, but all I could do was cry.