It takes courage to embrace the fear, the pain, the disappointment, the heartbreak, as we would embrace joy, a smile, or sunshine on a spring day. Those are easy to welcome. Only when there is no resistance – even to resistance – can you know freedom, the whole freedom of God. Only then will you understand directly that there is nothing wrong with you. ~ excerpted from Tools for Sanity by Kiran Mystic Girl in the City

The author of this short and deceptively simple book had a massive spiritual awakening almost a decade ago. In the wild aftermath, she met and became friends with some of the western world’s biggest spiritual teachers and began to find her own way. Unlike her friends though, Kiran isn’t interested in leading others to enlightenment.

Her mission is to transform pain to peace, right here, right now.

I’ve known Kiran since the mid-90’s when we went to theater school together. I’ve witnessed her massive transformation, sometimes up close and sometimes from afar. When she told me about the book, I jumped at the chance to read it. I thought it would take me a day or so. It’s only 71 pages. But months later I’m still carrying it with me, still picking it up, savoring the words and putting it back down. Her voice has been living inside me and I’ll find myself repeating certain sentences like mantras throughout my day.

It’s written in that enigmatic “awakened human” voice, similar to Eckart Tolle’s, which can feel slightly awkward and very different from most of what we read. But the love and compassion vibrate off the page and the message is clear:

Freedom is simple, but not easy.

Kiran hands us four vital tools with humor and honesty as she encourages us to follow our “delicious yes” –  Awareness, Acceptance, Alchemy and Alignment (which happen to be four of my favorite words).

A lot of what I  believe and teach found confirmation in these pages, which was comforting to me as a non-awakened-but-doing-my-best-to-be-conscious human. I love that Kiran doesn’t sugar-coat her story to fall in line with the “enlightenment as bliss” myth in our culture. Awakening for her was full of grief and horror. But through her journey she has distilled the essence of what causes us humans to suffer and with this book, she offers a gentle antidote.

It’s a wonderful book for all of us who wish to live with greater tenderness and less pain. Because as she says, “tenderness is the strongest force in the universe”. Amen to that.

Read Amazon reviews and purchase your copy here. Learn more about Kiran, Mystic Girl in the City here. Watch her Transformation Talk interview here.

P.S. Kiran graciously sent me a copy of the book to review. All opinions are mine.

P.P.S. Have you seen Liz Lamoreux’s new offering, Hand to Heart? Liz has a gift for lighting the way for others to see the beauty in their own lives. An ongoing community, Hand to Heart is a deep dive into into being present, exploring creativity and gathering with kindred souls. Having Liz’s wisdom & guidance in my life has been invaluable. If you’re searching for an ongoing supportive community to practice saying “yes, to this moment” with, it’s here. Special introductory pricing is happening now and the magic starts Saturday.

 

I owe Richard Wagner, Ph.D., ACS an apology. He sent me his book to review last year. I read the first three chapters of The Amateur’s Guide to Death and Dying: Enhancing the End of Life and put it down.

It was too close. Too close to Benjamin’s stillbirth. Too close to my terror (sprung from grief) that my daughter would die too. Too close to my own fear of dying and leaving her motherless.

A year later, I picked it back up.

This book is unlike any other I’ve seen. The back cover states:

“This workbook is primarily for those currently facing their mortality. But concerned family and friends, healing and helping professionals, lawyers, clergy, teachers, students, and those grieving a death will all benefit from joining in. Because, as we all know, none of us is getting out of here alive.”

Using the construct of a 10-week support group, the book shares the journeys of ten group members, each confronting their own mortality for different reasons. You, the reader, are the final group member and there is space for you to record your thoughts each week. The fictional characters and the group format are based on PARADIGM Programs, Inc., a non-profit organization founded by the author and dedicated to enhancing end of life.

The dialogue is sometimes awkward and a bit cheesy, but the book more than makes up for that in the way it covers a myriad of topics with intelligence, compassion and expertise. I tend to read with my heart wide open and once I could keep them straight, I found myself growing fond of the characters. I got all teary at the end as several of them discussed their impending deaths.

I appreciated and agreed with the author’s treatment of grief and all it encompasses. That in itself is worth recommending the book, as many myths and misconceptions are still perpetuated in grief-related writing. But this workbook goes far beyond grief in the way it addresses such topics as the legal details of dying, sexuality and end of life, spirituality and being in right relationship with yourself and others, and the physical processes of dying.

As hard as much of it is to read and think about, the information contained here is invaluable for all of us, whether we think we are currently dying or not. With candor, humor and understanding, topics that most of us prefer to ignore are brought to light and looked at through the individual lenses of the group participants and the presenting experts.

If you are actively dying or have been shocked into facing death for any reason, I recommend this book as a companion on your journey. And if you’re alive and well as far as you know, read it for a greater understanding of those around you who are approaching death, and for the guidance it will give you in facing the inevitability of your own mortality.

If you’re looking for a work of great literary merit, you might look elsewhere, but if you’re looking for a compassionate guide to living well until your last breath, you’ve found one here:

P.S. Forgive me Richard, and thank you for the work you do in the world.

I was first introduced to Erika Lyremark when a friend invited me to join her in taking Erika’s coaching program, The Morning Whip. I politely declined after checking out her website. I was terrified. The last thing I needed as I was still in the throes of grief was someone standing over me with a whip.

Fast forward 8 months or so and I was still terrified, but ready to take a tentative first step. I booked a 15-minute call with Erika. Two minutes in my fear of her vanished and I knew I was in kind, capable hands. What I came to understand about Erika as I worked with her is that in addition to a ton of business savvy and her whip-mistress persona, she has a huge heart. My full disclosure is that I adore her as a human being, I highly recommend her programs to anyone who is ready to pursue their “Red Carpet Dream” and I received an advanced copy of her book to review. Here are my thoughts on Think Like A Stripper: Business Lessons to Up Your Confidence, Attract More Clients & Rule Your Market.

After hearing snippets of the book and making my way through two of her coaching programs, I wondered if there would be anything new to read. While a few of the sixty-eight tips were familiar, there were many that had me nodding my head, underlining madly and laughing out loud.

Each of the short sections is divided into the Stripper Tip – a short story from her nine years on the pole, and The Strip-Down – a distillation of the story into a business-building tip. It’s a fun, easy, deceptively simple read. I enjoyed the behind-the-scenes glimpse into an unfamiliar world and appreciated the way Erika shared her story through a “lessons-learned” lens.

Some of the tips resonated more than others. With sixty-eight to choose from, you’re guaranteed to find a handful that you’re excited to put into practice. A few of my favorites were: #9: Serve. Don’t Sell; #25: You Only Need Two Bikinis; #26: Always Be Seducing; and #51: Become a Mistress of Patience. (Sound tantalizing? You’ll have to pick up the book to learn more).

The tone of Erika’s writing is sassy and contemporary, peppered with made up words like “striptastic” and plenty of stiletto talk. As a writer (and an editor in a past life I think), I would have loved one more edit, but its real strength lies in the content, not the writing style. Erika shares her hard-earned wisdom with humor, honesty and integrity. There are no get-rich-quick promises here. She writes in the introduction (which is a great read in itself): Some of the Stripper Tips demonstrate how to do business your way. Others offer  suggestions to increase productivity and efficiency so you can gain measurable momentum in your business. And some of the tips will propel you to be a more creative and resourceful problem solver. If you apply and practice these tips in your business, you will up your confidence, attract more clients and rule your market.

Think Like a Stripper has a number of strong endorsements, with good reason. If you’re someone with a dream and the desire to make it come true, working through this book will make a big difference in your results. And if you’re simply curious about the life of a smart, driven young woman who paid for two college degrees by getting naked in front of thousands of people, then you’ll like this book too.

P.S. For more info on Erika, the book and to get a free chapter, click here.

P.P.S. To watch Erika’s Transformation Talk interview, where she talks about the death of her friend Chad who was helping her write the book, click here.

 

 

 

 

During her Transformation Talk interview, I jokingly told Staci Boden that I was glad she’d written Turning Dead Ends Into Doorways: How to Grow Through Whatever Life Throws Your Way, so I didn’t have to. I didn’t mean to imply that I could have written her book, or that it could have come from anyone other than Staci herself. But it’s a book that needed to be written and it begs to be read. Staci’s years of experience, combined with her willingness to live the process she developed as she wrote the book, offer up a complete and masterful healing journey.

In other words, this book will change your life if you let it.

Staci writes about eight big, sometimes scary, always powerful, teachers who guide us through the unknown in what she calls Practical Spirituality: fear, awareness, choice, body, intuition, energy, intention and surrender. She’s funny and poignant, vulnerable and wise as she invites us on the journey, stopping frequently to provide prompts for self-discovery.

From a professional point of view, her book was a revelation because it was the first time I’d read much of what I write, believe, teach and preach from anyone else. I was nodding, highlighting, and writing in the margins. On a personal level, I found that every time I picked it up, I would read exactly what I needed to bring into my awareness that day, and that long after I’d put it down, her words would be continue to resonate within me.

Early in the book, Staci writes:

Ultimately, practicing consciously navigating the unknown teaches you how to create an And way of life. Additionally, the journey of discovering your own sense of balance between the present, future, and unknown by noticing, holding, sitting with, and following energy is what grows your power. Not my power, not the neighbor’s power, your unique power. The beauty of this practice is that how you explore, nourish, and express your power is authentic in nature. The magic of this practice is how everyday moments surprise you with life lessons strangely designed to facilitate just what you need to learn. Daily life becomes the training ground for developing your own power and sense of balance. Rather than guaranteed endings, moving through life this way produces intangible and priceless healing gifts – compassion, creativity, humility, balance, and trust. These gifts unite to form a foundation of resources that grow you into the next expression of who you are, whatever that is.

To me, this epitomizes what she and the book are offering, in the most holistic way I’ve seen it offered – practical guidance to support each of us in becoming who we are next meant to be.

Buy it. Read it. Live it. You won’t be sorry.

P.S. You have two more days to enter to win a copy of Staci’s book by leaving a comment here. Winner will be chosen at 10pm October 31st and notified via email.

P.P.S. In the interest of full disclosure: I was provided with a copy of the book by the publisher, for review. This in no way impacted anything I’ve written. This book is really, really good.