Support sometimes comes from the most unexpected places.

Today I got a call from a woman who was in my pregnancy support group. I loved the group and I was drawn to Nicole in particular, although all of the women were fantastic, connected, caring people. I knew they had all been told the news and I didn’t expect to hear from any of them – not because they don’t care or aren’t thinking of me, but because they are all pregnant, most of them for the first time, and their sensitivity to this kind of tragedy is heightened.

We had a beautiful conversation. Whether we speak again or not, I felt so supported by her in those moments and for that I am incredibly grateful.

I also got the warmest hug and offer of help from a local business owner. The last time I was in I talked for a long time with he and his wife about their son’s birth. The tears in his eyes when I told him about Benjamin were genuine. I continue to be blown away by this community we have found, this place we have decided to call home. I know people are good everywhere – they seem to be extra fantastic here.

*****

Holding Ada tonight as she drifted off to sleep, I was so grateful for the way we parent, for the chance to hold her close every night and sing to her, to know that she feels incredibly well loved and safe.

I wish I’d had the chance to do the same with Benjamin.

I hope that one day, we will bring another child into our family, whose sleeping body will lay cuddled up and relaxed in my arms as I sing softly into his ear.

The river it is flowing, flowing and flowing

The river it is flowing, back to the sea

Mother Earth carry me, your child I will always be

Mother Earth carry me, back to the sea