Vacation

If there was just one thing I could tell you about living the life of your dreams, knowing that it would be enough if you understood it, I would ask you to realize that you already are.

In the presence of greatness, The Universe

~ A Note from the Universe, by Mike Dooley

 

We are on vacation in Palm Springs this week. It’s hot. Early summer in the desert. I’m loving sitting by the pool, playing with my daughter in the water, feeling kissed by the sun. Internally I’m slowing down. Tuesday, Steve and I celebrated our 8th wedding anniversary. He didn’t get me a card. I bought one for him but forgot to write in it. We went for an early dinner, Ada sitting between us. Our conversation later that night wasn’t an easy one, but it was the kind that brings us closer together and reminds me why I’m grateful to have him as my friend, partner and love. We laughed as we kissed each other good night. Maybe next year we’ll have a more elaborate plan. Or not.

Lately I’ve been feeling so wrapped up in the now, in the present moment, that I can barely remember what happened two days ago, or what’s on my calendar for tomorrow. I’ll go about my day, brilliant (!) blog posts half-written in my head and by the time I sit at the computer, I can’t even catch a glimpse of the memory of it. I know I could make notes in my phone, or scratch it down on the back of someone’s business card, found stashed at the bottom of my purse, but at this moment, I’m okay with letting the thoughts go. I have a sense that what needs to come back to me, will. What doesn’t…well, I can guarantee that someone else will write about it beautifully and I’ll read it and think, oh yes, that’s what I was thinking about. I’m so glad she wrote it for me.

There’s something about floating in this space that is lovely and freeing. Maybe it’s the hours in the pool, my external physical experience mirroring what I’m feeling inside. I’m giving myself permission to both trust it and enjoy it. I have a sense clarity will come from hanging out here, and a renewed sense of purpose and ease. In the past I might have panicked or berated myself for my lack of action. Today I’m choosing to follow the path of least resistance and let life carry me along.

It feels good. After the last few years, I’ll take that wherever and whenever I can get it.

And you? What are you allowing today? What feels good to you?

 

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2 Responses to Vacation

  1. Lindsey says:

    I am allowing the tears and sadness that always floods in at this time of year. Not fighting it. (trying not to). xox

  2. Jessica M. says:

    I am allowing myself the sleep that I NEED even though it takes away time I would like to spend with my family. I have been learning that to survive with sanity one needs sleep or the quality time with my family will just be a blur of fog in my sleep deprived brain. My hubby and I just celebrated 4 years on 6/14 🙂 hope your vacation is fantastic <3

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